How I have missed this space.
The last month has been, well...lets face it, pretty grim.
February and March will never hold the same meaning for me, and that makes me quite sad.
Now instead of celebrating my birthday, and welcoming spring, those feelings will be mixed and muddled up with ones of loss and sadness.
People always die in 3's and Im dreading the next one, although Ive completely lost count at this stage...I think the designated 3 has happened for each, but Im not sure where one group ends and the next starts.
Eoghain is upstairs mixing, and dad is at the top of the road getting the patch ready for potatoes, so some sort of normality is beginning to fall into place, but I still feel a bit stuck, and not entirely rested after the last month of late nights, early morning pick ups, being sombre, eating very little of anything good, waiting, listening...being supportive...
January and the beginning of February were so hopeful, I was so full of energy and vim...now, I fell like going against the sun that is streaming in, and hibernating for another winter.
Im going to go plant some more flowers, which seems to be the only thing that I have actively been able to do lately. It mite help to shake this bad spell off?
Shellbell, I don't really know what's going on cause we haven't had the chats but I know what it's like to have death looming around and sticking in the corners of your eyes. Sunshine and life will help, slowly but surely, love you muchness. X
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